Uwe Boll…meet Brooke Burgess – BAM!

One of these things is not like the other…

THE PLACE – The River Rock Casino, for the first annual CAEAAs, hosted by Captain freakin’ Kirk.

THE CONTEXT – Presenting awards for Best Director (Animated Feature) and Best Game (Console, Handheld, and Player’s Choice).

THE DIALOGUE – Woefully one-sided verbal sparring with acid-tongued flurries like the following:

B: “Dr Boll…we’re clearly having a lot of fun up here. Some quality moments together. ”

U: (Silence)

B: “It’s all flowing so naturally…like it was destined. Maybe we’ve inadvertently stumbled across the key to your next masterpiece?

U: (More Silence)

B: Just think, man…you…me…Buddy Picture.

U: “I don’t think so. No.”

B: “Oh come on! Can’t you see it? I’ll play the tall, handsome, charming, charismatic, and talented one…and you can be the German.”

(Cue collective howl)

Fight night this Saturday at the Plaza of Nations. No promises, folks…but if one of the critics bows out, there may be a surprise of the saintly variety on the card. πŸ˜‰

16 Responses to “Uwe Boll…meet Brooke Burgess – BAM!”

  1. Matt Chan says:


  2. zeek says:

    Next sat as in..23rd? God damn, Awesome, I am so there. I’ll be in town after work at the big evil empire for a friend’s birthday party (Suicide Girls Live? Hot damn!). No way in the world I’ll miss this B.

  3. guppy says:

    Holy Shit. I will be there in your corner in spirit B!

  4. dumbwhiteguy says:

    AWESOMNESS!!!!!!!!!!! Make sure you blast him in the balls so as to limit the amount of his DNA he can spread on to the next generation.

  5. Elise says:

    Holy shit. I DEMAND VIDEO.

  6. admin says:

    No GUARANTEE that I’ll be fighting…but if someone drops out, I get to be the replacement. Boll and I actually got along backstage, and he played the straight man to perfection while we presented. Good times all around πŸ˜‰

  7. Saggio says:

    Fuck, is that a picture of Expo ’86?


  8. dumbwhiteguy says:

    I think you mean ’06

  9. Matthew says:

    *falls over laughing*

  10. Saggio says:

    I think you mean Γ’β‚¬Λœ06

    You’re an idiot.

    It is Expo 86. That is just insane. Where did you get these pictures, Brooke?

  11. admin says:

    Found it on the Interwebs, matey! Amazing what you can find on that darned thingamabobber! πŸ˜‰

  12. Rexfelum says:

    Okay, so, care to translate for those of us who have no idea what’s going on (aside from the prior blog post on this topic)?


  13. dumbwhiteguy says:

    “YouÒ€ℒre an idiot”

    When you say mean things like that, it hurts me, right in my heart. And besides I thought you were referring to the blog picture. Yes, yes I do realize that it’s an unforgiviable sin, but could you, in you infinite mercy, seek to forgive oh sweet lord and master Sag.

  14. Susan (FA) says:

    Yeah, b, it has been WAY too long since we talked….I didn’t even KNOW you were presenting at an awards show…let alone with UWE!

    SHEESH! πŸ™‚ Funny, though…

  15. CruelHazel says:

    Oh, hon, you keep moving up that ladder, don’t you?
    Remember hon, I’m ALWAYS proud of you.

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